I'm by nature solitary, scar...
I'm by nature solitary, scarred by spear and wounded by sword, weary of battle. I frequently see the face of war, and fight hateful enemies; yet I hold no hope of help being brought to me in the battle, before I'm eventually done to death. In the stronghold of the city sharp-edged swords, skilfully forged in the flame by smiths, bite deeply into me. I can but await a more fearsome encounter; it is not for me to discover in the city any of those doctors who heal grievous wounds with roots and herbs. The scars from sword wounds gape wider and wider; death blows are dealt to me by day and by night. What am I?12 pirate jokes
1. Why is pirating so addictive?
Because once you lose yer first hand, you get hooked!
2. Why don't pirates shower before they walk the plank?
Because they'll wash up on shore later.
3. How do you save a dying pirate?
You give him CPARRRRR.
4. What happened when Bluebeard fell overboard in the Red Sea?
He got marooned.
5. Why do pirates suck at card games?
Because they always stand on the deck.
6. What did the pirate wear on Halloween?
A pumpkin patch.
7. A pirate goes to the doctor to have the spots on his arm examined. The doctor says: "They're benign."
The pirate replies: "No, no, doc, there be 11. I counted them before I came here."
8. Why'd the pirate go to the Apple store?
He needed a new iPatch!
9. Where can you find a pirate who has lost his wooden legs?
Right where ye left him.
10. What do ye call a pirate with two eyes and two legs?
A rookie.
11. What do you call a pirate with no arms and no legs?
An expert.
12. What does a vegan pirate have on its shoulder?
A carrot!