A young woman asks her mother, "Mom, how many kind of penises are there?"
The mother, surprised, answers, "Well, daughter, a man goes through three phases. In a man's twenties, a man's penis is like an oak, mighty and hard. In his thirties and forties, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his fifties, it is like a Christmas tree."
"A Christmas tree?" the young woman asks.
"Yes, dried up and the balls are there for decoration only."
John Alexander NewlandsBorn 26 Nov 1837; died 29 Jul 1898 at age 60. John Alexander Reina Newlands was an English chemist who first established an order of elements by the atomic weights, and observed a periodicity in the properties. Every eighth element has similar properties, hence he named the Law of Octaves (7 Feb 1863). It took another quarter century, and the work of others, such as Dmitry Mendeleev, for the significance of his discovery to be recognized. |
