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Joke Of The Day
Guilty Conscience
An elderly Italian Jew wanted to unburden his guilty conscience by talking to his Rabbi. "Rabbi, during World War II, when the Germans entered Italy, I pretended to be a Catholic and changed my name from Levy to Spumoni, and I am alive today because of it."
"Self preservation is allowable, and the fact that you never forgot that you were a Jew is admirable," said the Rabbi."Rabbi, during the war, a beautiful Jewish woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans. I hid her in my attic, and they never found her."
"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to feel guilty."
"It's worse, Rabbi. I was weak and told her she must repay me with sexual favors, which she did, repeatedly."
"You were both in great danger and would have suffered terribly if the Germans had found her. There is a favorable balance between good and evil, and you will be judged kindly. Give up your feelings of guilt."
"Thank you, Rabbi. That's a great load off my mind. But I have one more question."
"And what is that?"
"Should I tell her the war is over?"
"Self preservation is allowable, and the fact that you never forgot that you were a Jew is admirable," said the Rabbi."Rabbi, during the war, a beautiful Jewish woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her from the Germans. I hid her in my attic, and they never found her."
"That was a wonderful thing you did, and you have no need to feel guilty."
"It's worse, Rabbi. I was weak and told her she must repay me with sexual favors, which she did, repeatedly."
"You were both in great danger and would have suffered terribly if the Germans had found her. There is a favorable balance between good and evil, and you will be judged kindly. Give up your feelings of guilt."
"Thank you, Rabbi. That's a great load off my mind. But I have one more question."
"And what is that?"
"Should I tell her the war is over?"
Source: JokesOfTHeDay.net - Brain Teasers Partner
On This Day
Campbell water speed recordIn 1964, Donald Campbell broke the world water speed record with an average speed of 276.33 mph (441.71 km/h) with his speedboat, Bluebird, on Lake Dumbleyung, Perth, Australia. Earlier the same year, in Jul 1964, he had broken the land speed record at 403.1 mph (648.72 km/h) on Lake Eyre salt flat, Australia. Together, they made him the only person to break both land and water speed records in the same year. That land speed record only stood for three months before Art Arfon, on 27 Oct 1964, achieved a land average speed of 536.71 mph (863.75 km/h) in a jet car on Bonneville Salt Flats, Utah. Campbell continued attempting yet higher speeds, but died 4 Jan 1967 when his jet-powered boat crashed on Coniston Water.« |
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