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Bennie Keisling

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What do you have to give before you can keep it?
Always old, sometimes new. Never sad, sometimes blue. Never empty, sometimes full. Never pushes, always pulls. What am I?
You can swallow me, but I can swallow you. What am I?

Carl Wilhelm Scheele

Born 9 Dec 1742; died 21 May 1786 at age 43. (also Karl) Swedish chemist who discovered oxygen in 1772. Scheele, a keen experimenter, worked in difficult and often hazardous conditions. In his only book, Chemical Observations and Experiments on Air and Fire (1777), he stated that the atmosphere is composed of two gases, one supporting combustion, which he named "fire air" (oxygen), and the other preventing it, which he named "vitiated air" (nitrogen). Due to delay in his publication, he lost priority to Priestley's discovery of oxygen in 1774. Scheele discovered many substances, such as chlorine (1774), manganese (1774), tungsten (1781), molybdenum (1782), glycerol, hydrocyanic (prussic) acid, citric acid, hydrogen sulphide and hydrogen fluoride. He also discovered a process resembling pasteurization.

Soda Machine

One day a blonde went up to a soda machine, put in some money, and a soda came out. She got really excited and started to put more money into the machine. The more and more she did it, the more the soda came out.

After a while someone walked up to her and asked if they could please get a soda.

The blonde looked at them angrily and said: "Get out of my face, I'm winning!"

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