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robert daley

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You use a knife to slice my head and weep beside me when I am dead. What am I?

Sir Andrew Noble

Died 22 Oct 1915 at age 84 (born 13 Sep 1831).(Baronet) Scottish physicist and gunnery expert, known as a founder of the science of ballistics. He invented the chronoscope, a device for measuring very small time intervals, and in about 1862, he used it to measure the velocity of shot in gun barrels. His investigations in ballistics led to the redesign of guns, new methods of loading, and development of new types of gunpowder.

The Wrong Last Rites

"A PRIEST, PLEASE!" the dying man says again. Then out of the crowd steps a little old Jewish man of at least eighty years of age.
"Mr. Policeman," says the man, "I'm not a priest. I'm not even a Catholic. But for fifty years now I've been living behind St. Mary's Catholic Church on Third Avenue, and every Friday night I listen to the Catholic litany. Maybe I can be of some comfort to this man."
The policeman agrees and brings the octogenarian over to where the dying man lay. He kneels down, leans over the injured man, and says in a solemn voice:
"B - 4. I - 19. N - 38. G - 54. O - 72."
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