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What’s way worse than Friday the 13th?
Monday the whatever.

Why is Friday the thirteenth one of the worst days to get arrested on?
Because the judge will only be in on Monday.

What day do eggs hate most?
Fry-day the 13th!

Knock knock!
Who’s there?
Ice cream!
Ice cream who?
Ice-cream, you scream, we all scream because it’s Friday Thirteenth.

What’s the worst part about waking up to realize it’s Friday the thirteenth?
Realizing that you still have to go to work.

Why are people scared of going out of the house on Friday the thirteenth?
Because of shark attacks.

Why don’t people like going to work on Friday the thirteenth every year?
Because they hate their jobs very much for the rest of the year too.

Why do people say that Friday the thirteenth is one of the unluckiest day of the year?
Oh, don’t worry about it if you don’t know, you’ll find out.

What’s the worst thing that can happen on Friday the thirteenth?
Getting married.

Why did the old man wake up on Friday the 13th and decide that nothing bad could happen to him all day?
Because he had already gotten married.

What’s the best thing you can do on Friday the thirteenth?
Continue to be depressed about your last divorce.

Why should you play the lottery on Friday the thirteenth?
Because when you lose this time, you’ll at least expect it.

What’s the most unlucky thing that you can do on Friday the thirteenth?
Be born into the world.

Why should you never go out on a date on Friday the thirteenth?
Because everyone knows it’s the one day of the year where you won’t be lucky.

What usually happens on Friday the thirteenth?
Nothing at all.

Killers eagerly look forward to which day of the month?
Fri-Die the 13th.

Which types of people consider Friday the thirteenth as lucky as any other day?
The smart ones.

How do you know that it’s Friday the 13th?
Everyone will tell you.

Why do people consider Friday the 13th unlucky?
Because it’s not a Saturday.

What starts with the letter J and gets called the reason for the season by some people who celebrate this special holiday?
Jason.

What do you call someone who wakes up on Saturday the fourteenth?
Lucky.

What’s the most difficult part about the average Friday the thirteenth?
Making sure that you survive it.